Substitute's Solo
by Tahaku
Summary: Orihime has always believed in aliens. Everyone else? Not so much. But Ichigo and Tatsuki KNOW they exist. How? They had a run in with one. A psychotic, pinkhaired, indestructible guitar weilding housekeeper from space. Ichigo has a reminder of the time spent in proximity to Haruko, and now he'll have to let others know. Two-shot.


**Hello, everyone! I guess I should be apologizing that I haven't updated recently, and while my reasons are legitimate, they don't cover for all of it. I've mostly been lazy.**

**Hopefully, I can get my lazy ass to finish the long ass chapter that I have planned for Fairy Princess, Shingami Knight. I'll tell you now, it reveals a bit of Ichigo and Naoko's past. But not much, sorry.**

**I've been having this idea in my head for some time now, and I decided to just go ahead and post it. So without further ado, I bring you the very first Bleach/Fooly Cooly crossover:**

**Substitute's Solo**

**(Is putting a disclaimer necessary? We all know neither series are mine.)**

**=3=**

'_How did it become like this?'_

That was the question going through Ichigo's head at the situation before him.

I guess I should do some explaining for you to understand what's going on.

Ichigo Kurosaki was relaxing at the park with his friends Yasutora Sado, better known as Chad, Tatsuki Arisawa, Orihime Inoue, Rukia Kuchki, Uryuu Ishida, Keigo Asano, and Mizurio Kojima. Chad had his guitar and was playing every now and then, while talking, listening mostly, to the others. Rukia mentioned that she remembered seeing a guitar case in Ichigo's room, which was backed by Chad, and they had started asking Ichigo to go and get it. Naturally, Ichigo refused, but his friends were persistent. Well, that was until Orihime decided to start asking an innocent enough answer.

"Do you believe in aliens?" was here absurd question. But this is Orihime here, absurd things like that are norm for her.

This brings us full circle to where we started.

**=3=**

"So, Kurosaki-kun," asked Orihime, dragging Ichigo out of his thoughts on getting out of this predicament. "Do you believe in aliens?"

"Huh?" Ichigo's thought processes were barely refocusing. "What?"

"Geez, Ichigo," said Tatsuki said as she grinned mischievously. "We all know that Orihime's beautiful and all, but that doesn't mean you have to lose yourself over it." That caused both Ichigo and Orihime to blush, and Ichigo to stutter in his bid to answer.

"I…ah…"

Rukia, who's sitting next to him, jabs him in the side with her elbow. "Yeah, idiot, get your mind out of the gutter and on her question!"

"I-I-I…" Ichigo abruptly stands up and starts walking in the direction of his house. "I'm gonna go get my guitar…" Just before he gets too far, they hear him grumbling something about a pink haired psychopath.

"So what's up with him?" asked Renji, turning his attention back from watching Ichigo walk off.

"Aliens….are a bit of a touchy subject for Ichigo," clarified Tatsuki. "I guess we pushed him too hard."

"Hm," Chad hummed in agreement.

"And why's that?' asked Rukia.

Everyone remained quiet with rapt attention as Tatsuki explained. "A few years ago, Ichigo's dad hired a house keeper since Yuzu wasn't feeling very well. She was only there for about a month, but that entire time was pure insanity. I only went there once while she remained at the house."

"Why's that, Tatsuki?" asked Orihime innocently enough.

Tatsuki sighed. "Because…..the housekeeper turned out to be a psychotic bitch from outer space that slammed just about anyone with that damn indestructible guitar of hers." Tatsuki hugged herself, trying to suppress the shiver rolling down her body. "I saw her enough times around town to know that. Plus that Moped of hers…that thing was insanely powerful and fast."

"Wait," interrupted Rukia. "What was the name of this 'housekeeper'?" Her tone of voice and hard look showed just how serious she had gotten.

"Raharu Haruhara…or as she preferred to be called… Haruko."

"What?!" blurted out Keigo. "You mean to tell me that _Ichigo_ was the lucky bastard that she was living with?!"

Tatsuki promptly decked him hard, sending him sprawling on the floor.

Slamming a foot onto his head, she proceeded shout at him, ignoring Orihime's attempts at placating the fiery tomboy. "You dumbass! There is no way in hell that Ichigo was lucky with her having lived at his place!"

"That woman was more of a curse than anything," said Mizurio, absently. "No matter how alluring she was."

Chad nodded in agreement, though, it went mostly unnoticed.

Uryuu promptly decided to add his knowledge on the guitar wielding menace as well. "I remember around that time," he said, fixing his glasses with his index finger. "There was a great influx of patients at my father's hospital during that time. I believe I remember seeing a larger count of pluses as well." He stares pointedly at Rukia and Renji. "Isn't the Soul Society supposed to do something about that kind of thing?

Everyone directed their gaze at the two Shingami as they waited for them to answer, even Keigo, head still trapped under Tatsuki's shoe; except for Orihime, as something happened to catch her eye and she moved close to see what it was.

"Well…um…" began Renji, trying his best to respond to the quincy's interrogation.

Rukia decided to answer, since she was already used to doing so for the teens. "The reason that Soul Society never did anything is because—"

She was interrupted when they all felt the reiatsu of a hollow make itself known. They all tensed as they tried to pin point its location.

Uyruu was the first to realize where the hollow had decided to appear. "It's practically on top of Kurosaki."

Everyone relaxed some, knowing that, if it's close to Ichigo, then it was as good as dead.

That is…until Orihime decided to speak up.

"Um…g-guys…?"

Everyone turned to look at the auburn haired healer with dawning horror once they saw what she was holding in her hands.

The one object that practically never leaves the substitute's person:

His shinigami combat pass.

Renji was the only one to say anything in that tense moment, and it was only two words; but those two words summed up the entire situation completely.

"…oh, shit."

At that, pretty much everyone present started to make a mad dash to get to Ichigo as fast as possible.

**=3=**

If Ichigo were to sum up the situation he was now in, it'd be the word he's been repeating ever since he realized that he couldn't find his combat pass. Meaning that he couldn't change into his shinigami form, and that he was open game to the hollow in front of him.

"Fuck!" growled Ichigo as he dodged another swipe of the hollow.

"**Come on,"** called out the hollow, its mirthful tone clearly showing that it enjoyed toying with tempting delicacy before it, **"just give up and let me eat your soul; your delicious smelling soul. There's no way you can escape me." **It was a large hollow, easily twice the size of Ichigo, hunched over on its legs, its skin a very dark grey-blue, it had thick limbs, sharp, pointed claws, and its mask was some sort of beast with a long snout. Its hole on its lower abdomen.

"Like hell I will!" shouted Ichigo. _'Damn it! I don't really want to, but I might have to resort to using this.' _Ichigo hastily glanced down at the guitar sleeve in his hand.

"**It's no use trying to resist human,"** the hollow said, still smug, **"you're still going to die!" **The hollow made another swipe at Ichigo that was obvious to both that he wouldn't be able to dodge it.

'_Damn it! I got no choice!'_ Ichigo shouted in his head as he saw no other option that would let him leave unscathed. He stopped trying to dodge and faced the hollow.

"**Ha! I finally got you!"** cheered the hollow triumphantly as it brought its claw down on the orange head whose hair shaded his eyes from view.

Only for the deep hum of feedback to sound out as the claw is parried.

"**What the…"** The hollow was seriously confused that his attack was blocked, and by a flimsy object no less, if memory served it well.

"…of all the times…" Ichigo said to himself, further confusing the hollow as it saw Ichigo reach for what appeared to be an engine pull cord showing through one of the tears in the guitar sleeve.

"**What are you going on about human?"** asked the hollow, trepidation entering its voice as an ominous feeling started to emanate from what it had thought was a delicious snack. It tried to push those feelings away and resume its assumed dominance of the situation. **"N-nothing you do will save you from being eaten."**

"Oh really…?" asked the strawberry as his hand wrapped around the handle of the pull cord. The tone in which he voiced the question made the hollow involuntarily take a step back. "'Cause…from the way I see it, you're gonna die. Very. Painfully." With that, Ichigo pulled on the pull cord, making the guitar roar to life like a chainsaw; and the remains of the guitar sleeve to blast apart, revealing the black guitar within. "Rrraaahhhh!" Ichigo charged at the hollow, catching it off guard at the suddenness of his attack.

The same deep hum of feedback resounded as Ichigo slammed his guitar into the closest arm of the hollow, shattering it completely.

The hollow's roar of pain was cut short as Ichigo slammed his very destructive instrument into its chest, knocking it back for several feet. It struggled to get up using its good arm, only to stop as it looked up to see the orange haired substitute descending towards it with the guitar held over his head to crash down on its head.

The resounding feedback was much louder as it punched straight through the hollow's head and into the concrete, cracking it.

Right before it had hit, the hollow could've sworn it saw reiatsu pouring from the guitar.

Standing hunched over the disintegrating remains of the hollow, Ichigo took deep breaths to calm himself down. After returning to his regular breathing pattern, he straightens up, runs a hand through his hair, and turns around.

"I know you guys are there! Get out here already!"

Immediately after his declaration, every one of his friends starts walking into view, the majority looking guilty at being found out, from behind various buildings and objects.

Renji and Rukia, in their shinigami forms, shunpo into existence right in front of him, both looking very relieved and astounded.

Looking down at the guitar in Ichigo's hand, Renji is the first to say anything, "What the hell…? Hey, Rukia, isn't that…?"

"Yes," Rukia responded in all seriousness. "It's been a while since I've seen one of these…"

Before it can go any further, a low voice grabs everyone's attention.

"…how long…?"

"Huh?"

The collective intelligent answer runs throughout the group.

"How long were you guys there?" Ichigo's voice comes out in a growl.

Orihime is the first to answer.

"Um…me and Tatsuki arrived right when you finished the hollow."

"When you finally decided to fight back," came Rukia's reply.

"From the start," said Uryuu, adjusting his glasses. "And I must say, it was pretty pathe—ack!"

Everyone, except Uryuu, who's fallen onto his back and out of sight as he was standing on a building, turn their attention towards the source of what fired whatever relatively harmless projectile to see Ichigo holding his guitar like a rifle. A smoking gun barrel visible on the head.

After grabbing his guitar by the neck again and shouldering it like he would Zangestu, Ichigo walks over to Orihime, who he noticed has his Combat Pass, takes it and starts walking back home.

"You're an ass, Ishida…

**=3=**

Elsewhere, a pink haired woman who looks to be about in her early twenties, a leather guitar case slung over her shoulder, leans on the handle bars of her yellow Vespa, when the rectangle of metal on the bracelet on her right wrist begins to clink and lift slightly. It's pointing in the direction of a certain town.

"Oh?" A mischievous grin finds its way to her face as she places a blue helmet on and pulls down the goggles. "Looks like I'll have something fun to do."

She turns the key in the ignition and takes off in the next direction of her next source of entertainment.

**Aaaaaaannnnd that's that. **

**I really needed to get my creative juices flowing again, so I decided to write and post this. It'll probably just be a two shot, so nothing really long; just a little push for myself.**

**Well…I guess I should talk about my two current stories a bit.**

**Shinigami of True Cross (STC): I'm gonna read the manga (since I need to do that) so that I can actually formulate a better plot than the one I have now. I'm still gonna do the situation that I started at the end of chapter 2, but after that, they're gonna get into the problems of the manga. I'm kinda following the anime at the moment, but I'm fixing that.**

**Fairy Princess, Shingami Knight (FP,SK): Most already know how it'll end, but let me assure you that you know it'll end in only one way, how that end is achieved is something you, hopefully, won't expect (some might have noticed what'll happen with how I ended chapter 3, but I don't fully count on it) and really enjoy. I plan to make it pretty long because I haven't posted in a while.**

**Last thing: **

**I'm adopting Time's Twist from Fic Hunter! PM me if you have any questions or rants on my decision.**

**Review, Favorite, or Follow, I don't care, just enjoy.**


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